Monday, September 6, 2010

It’s a Poo-tastrophe!

Why can’t my child find a nice art medium to work with?
Try some paint, pencils or a whole bottle of PVA glue!
But no, he doesn’t want to work with those boring things,
My child prefers to express himself artistically with Poo!

He went down for his afternoon snooze so easily,
I get so much done while he’s down for his nap.
But today he awoke with a surprise for Mummy,
Because half his room was all covered in crap!

It’s not the first time he’s done this kind of thing,
We quite often face-off in this gross imbroglio,
I’ve got to find a way for him to stop this disgusting habit,
Because he’s collecting himself an impressive fecal-folio.

Does anyone else have this problem, or am I alone?
Is there someone I can talk to, or maybe join a group?
I’m getting pretty desperate! I’m willing to try anything!
I can’t go through it again, cleaning up all that poop!

I haven’t taken any photos, you don’t need any proof.
The whole grossness-level is way off the chart!
But If I was to exhibit his “artistic expressions”,
I’d have to call it “Follow Through - A great work OFART”.


toushka said...

love the way you've rhymed imbroglio with fecal-folio. Genius.
Millar only did this once thankfully.
I've heard tips about putting the nappy on backwards and using duct tape. Good luck.

Voluptacon said...

Thank you!!
I personally think it's a work of genius rhyming imbroglio with fecal folio! I'm glad my genius was recognised!! Hehehe.
Must try duct tape....

Me 'N My Monkeys said...

lmao, glad i wasn't the only one!
been there done that, thank god we are out of nappies now!!
*New Follower*

Voluptacon said...

Hello there Me 'N My Monkeys.
Ahhh, a fellow mother of a Poocasso!
I'll be glad when this one is out of nappies.

j. said...

I can, thankfully, say the little miss has never been THAT creative... But I do recall an Aunt who had multiple do-do doodlers, I shall ask her if she has any words of wisdom when I see her this weekend.

PottyMouthMama said...

I've been there. I know your pain. I tried nappies on backwards. FAIL. I tried onesies. FAIL. I think I wound up double-onesing until the mood passed. I totally feel your pain.

leticia said...

Yes I put my 2 1/2 yr old daughter to her afternoon nap when i thought i better go and check her and here she was painted her whole cot in poop.
Trying to get the smell out of everything was BLOODY hard

Voluptacon said...

Thanks guys.
I'll probably just end up handcuffing him, mace and tranquilizer darts... All good :D

EmmaK said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
EmmaK said...

Nurture him ! one day he may become a shit artist like Chris Ofili whose medium is elephant dung

Voluptacon said...

I definitely will!
Either that or we are going into mass pooduction of "Atti painted" Greeting cards.